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When we were together I subscribed to his online journal - which the last few days he's started to write in again, I read it because I got sent an email about it (I had forgot about it) and every entry is saying how he's sorry, he wants to turn back time and he wants to be with me and he regrets everything he's said and done.

I keep trying to fight it, but I do love him still. We can't even talk. I'm not sure I could talk to him given the chance (he's put he is asking his solicitor for supervised meeting between us).

I'd love to be with him like we planned but how? Is it even possible? I'm not sure if I could forgive him for things he's said about myself and my family - or our son.

I keep crying I just don't know what to do. I hate him for everything he's done but I love him =/