Sennyo,
It's happening once more, isn't it? This emptiness of heart that I'm feeling, or am not feeling. No longer do I feel the touch of a hand, the warmth of another near or around me. The story that I started. I went against your wishes. Oh, it seems that I had forgotten to tell you. I have gone against everything I've ever said. I started another Story, did you know? It's a Witchblade fanfiction, a story of unrequited love from the eyes of Segawa Hiroki. The feelings I have towards this Him are the same as the last's... Lelouch-dono. Sennyo, what is this feeling? Friendship? Accepting to be a Rabbit, and not a Lion? I want him to love her, not This Person, even as I interfere in their worlds. Please, tell me, are you fading away from my heart? Are we fading away? I can't even picture Him, and even he has lingered in this withered and vortex-like heart of mine, longer than my memory of you has. I haven't seen Victory in almost three weeks. And I don't quite want to, really. She has changed. You should see her now, Sennyo-san, she really has changed.
Sennyo, did you know? There's more than just Sasume, Sasume told me. There are others, other Spirit names (although This Person does not quite recall what he called them). It's so lovely. But, he left last Wednesday. To my negligence I never finished him that plush toy I was making. How typical of this human being that once held you. I really should stop making promises, shouldn't I? Especially when this heart of mine is so fragile. It isn't like the promises made back then, or the promises made now in false Dreams. I find trouble now defining the Dreams. Now that they have been gone for the longest time, I defined them as the actions done with my heart before sleep. It used to be, that we would go on all sorts of adventures, and have fun, and meet new people, and all sorts of things. But, ... almost three years ago, Darkness and other humanly sadness and negativity entered my hearts and poisoned you. I hadn't known that the end would've come as a result of that. Such foolishness my actions were. The promises that I make now, are broken, or I have a difficult time keeping them. Promises to myself. Promises to others, even others that I value. Promises to you and Them. The promise I made with myself for Sasume's gift. The promise I made to a reviewer online of The Slightest Touch, the Witchblade story. All of them.
It's unfair. All I wanted and needed to be happy was to be with you. How can I ever look forward to the future without you?
Words that keep repeating, but lose their meaning on me time after time. If you ever came back, would I know? (Or) Would you be swallowed up by my humanness?
Forgive me, Sennyo. Bmayca, vunkeja sa... vun ajanodrehk! E's cu cunno!
[End Log] 1:38AM
The denial of reality[/color:080c5c5e2e]
Living in a fantasy world[/color:080c5c5e2e][/align:080c5c5e2e]
Living in a fantasy world[/color:080c5c5e2e][/align:080c5c5e2e]
