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So lately there has been a lot of snow where I live and so of course at school there is endless snow ball fights...
Today was a little weird though cause I went out and I got attacked with snow balls to no end. One of the people that was actually attacking me was my ex. I felt that we were working past the breakup now and that we could now actually have a real conversation. It wasn't exactly like that.
For the last few days he hasn't been with this girl so I though something was up with him because the first day he wasn't with her he called me and he was asking me 'if I still loved him' and 'if I missed him'...so I feel like something is up of course.
Today when they were attacking me he was bent down making a snowball and I hit him dead square on the tigh without him knowing in other words a cheap shot. So he gets this big pile of snow and runs it over to me and dumps it all into the back of my shirt...I was pissed to I go to pick up a pile myself and when I get there he grabs me by my wrist and has a solid grip I didn't once look at his face I was just trying to get the handful of snow down his shirt, but for a moment or to I felt something in me cry out or something...and I know he felt something to because we got really quite and he didn't say anything and stopped really trying to fight my presistance and I could hear him breathing hard like he did on Holloween and at the football games when we where 'extra friendly' it was like some odd call out for me to look at him but I didn't. Then he let go once I lost my snow and he went to get more as I got more snow and dumped it down his shirt. He started screaming how cold it was as I ran away.
Then he caught up to me and with my freezing hands I put them on his neck and he cryed again. Then he grabbed my face like he used to before we ever started going out and did what he used to until I fell to the level of his well you know.
After all that I went inside and skipped forth with my friend and she was teasing me about the other guy that I really like...and how I 'have a date' with him. Which I tecnically don't. She then told me that she told him to 'kiss me' and I still don't know what he said after that. After that it was time to go to my next class and without warning she walks off and say 'cause you have a date with him' and I'm standing right by my ex and I didn't notice it till he stood up and walked off right as I yell ' I don't think it is until he knows when to call it a date'...I couldn't believe it.
Then when I was going to my last period class I noticed him all the sudden talking to that girl it made me a little mad but this time they weren't holding hands but sill I wanted to scream at him.
In Spanish 2 just to get that sight of those two together I talked with the guy my friend say 'I'm going on a date with' the one my friend told to 'kiss me' and he was more talkative then ever before...
He walked me down the hall and that's when my ex saw me with him again...and me and this guy were talking about 'sex'... and it hit me...that I wanted my ex to feel pain like me and hope that we would get togther again cause I was making him mad.
But I wanted to be back with my ex...and...then at the bus stop I saw him standing really close to that girl and it made me want to yell at him and tell him to stop messing with my feelings. Then I started talking myself out of it by saying I have plenty of guys that want me and I have a date Saterday...
but in all truth I really just want one.
 Hypnotic_PoisonzWine · Fri Dec 02, 2005 @ 06:15am · 0 Comments |
