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im really into green tea now. apparently it prevents cancer and does good things. i like the scent of the leaves. and stirring it with a long teaspoon and watching the light dance off the surface so mesmerizing. it reminds me of the sporadic things in life that make it worth it, so i keep spinning it around and around. i slept for about an hour today and i am not wearing contacts. i feel so awaken now because the best thing to do at home is let the ipod shuffle until you drift off into sleep, and then i can wake up feeling newly refreshed. and i lie there for the longest time and welcome my thoughts back into my mind, because that is the best time for it to happen. during the day i cannot focus well on the things i want to wander off about so when i get to relax for a moment it all comes back to me.

i change every few weeks even though i hate the feeling of a new. but it's something i can't help because i'm constantly thinking of the kind of person i want to be and who i am to others. i worry too much and think i've always went over the limits. it'll never really stop but i'll rest to a peaceful goal at last.