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fine fine. i still love you. it's been ages and i still do.
i still write about you. to me, writing is pouring out my very soul. the words i write are echoes from the very depths of my heart. and it's you that i think about when i write. i write as if every word i type down or put on the paper is for you. thinking that maybe someday, someday, these words will find their way to you.. and finally you'll be able to know what's inside me.. what's inside my heart.

sigh. ive tried to kill this love. sometimes, i thought i've already won myself off of you. it wasn't until now that i've finally realized that i still haven't. i told you before that im gonna love you forever. god. i didn't know that it would be like this. looks like i really meant what i said. im hexed.. cursed with this love.

im now acknowledging the fact that i still haven't gotten over you. i still think you're my one true love. you know, that lone star. sigh. you are still that to me... for the past few months since i told you we should not talk ever again, i was sort of confused with a lot of things. i started questioning what love really is.. if what i have for you was really love.. if i really know what love is.. i was so confused.. because when i think about love, i think about you.. but the break up destroyed everything i thought about love. and i felt that i cant say it's love when it didn't even last.

but i guess im still in love with the old you. not you. the old one. i have this image of you.. this memory of what i think as who you are. but as they say, people change. im not sure if that's still you. thats why we can never go back to how we used to be. ive changed too. i asked my friend just last night why hs love doesn't seem to last. hehe. and he said it's because people change. yeah. people change.

i guess you've already moved on. now, i won't fight off this feeling.. but i won't feed it too. i would just let it be.. let it have a natural death or if it doesn't die, then fine. i guess the more you force it out of yourself, the more stubborn it gets and stays.