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i feel strange latly.
everything i know is a lie.
i feel tired all the time...and all i want to do lately is punch a whole through the wall.
i bite everything...i was even chewing on tape yesterday.
why?
idk...
stress probly.
but, why would i be stressed out?
this isn't knew...
it's been happening for mounths now...but i just relized how it has been affecting me.
i can't stop drinking caffene.
and two days ago, i find out caffene is a drug.
great.
i'm always nervous...
and i can't stop locking the freaken doors where ever i go.
i feel sad.
about alot of things,
but yet i don't feel like talking about them,
so i cover them up.
i am ALWAYS angry.
if i look at a wall long enough i'll scream at it.
my nails are all bitten off,
and my ears are becomming SUPER sensitive to everything.
yesterday,
i swear i heard my sisters heart beat.
when i'm sleeping,
i'll have strange dreams.
like, i had a dream that my friend katie was a vampire and she and this guy were trying to turn me into one.
he bit me,
and i died atomatically.
i woke up screaming my head off,
and in the dream i felt the pain of sharp teeth in my vien.
*shudders*
when i go to scocial events, like dances, i literally sit in a corner as far away from people as posibble and i don't talk to anyone exsept the paople i came with, and only my closest friends.
i can't stop thinking about if andre' likes me...
and i KNOW he hates me.
well...ok i don't actually know,
because i can't feel his aura...
but i can tell he hates me.
-sighs-
i don't know what to do anymore...and when i think about going to school now,
i get mad. because the people at school are giving me a hard time about the andre' guy i like.
so,
i feel like punching a whole through a wall at school, and at home.
people say that you should try crying when you feel bad,
but even now i can't cry.
i havn't been able to cry in a while.
i want to cry so bad,
or at least scream and punch a door, but...
i can't.









i know people have far more problems then me.
that is why i do not say these things.
i want to help people with there problems...not bother them with mine.
so,
andyone who has just read this,
i apolojize for being such a sap.
please forgive me.