I'm somewhat mad I think, sad, and just confused.
I don't even know what I want anymore....
I just wish it would all end sometimes ya know?
just freeze time and just...relax.
stop the world for a bit so I can have a break.
sometimes I even feel so bad that I wanna die, other days I feel fine.
heh heh...seems my mind's breaking apart again...
heh heh...freakin merry christmas myself....
figures....
I was debating whether or not to write this, but I just figured I needed get this outta my head I guess..
I don't know what I want anymore....
I mean, I wanna feel better, but I....I don't know...I think more than anything I just need someone that'll be here for me regardless if they like me or not ( and I meant like as in like like, not like as in a friend.)
its so lonely here.... everyday I notice more and more that I'm soo different from most people...
its not a bad thing, especially since I'm better than most of those retarded gangster idiots,
but...I just want someone whos always there who understands me...
like when Alex always gave me hugs in design tech class.. that was great..I always felt loved everyday, but shes too distracted with her boyfriend and were really not in the same classes anymore. only german but shes distracted and we can't walk around the classroom freely like we did in design tech freshman year.
*sigh* I'm so mixed up......
I don't have anyone in my school that I've met thats like me... well, allysa somewhat, but we still have to fix the friendship gap that formed over like, a whole year.
Dx I'm in the "I wanna just lay here and die" mood at the moment.
guess I'll stop talkin now.
I'll finish with a mood pic:
