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to feel confused to feel lost. to feel empty all are stages, all are phases. i try to understand but i never do, i do but it won't form itself into something that i can say. i see it but it gets lost in translation. i am lost in translation. i am lost in a see of sound and i never seem to find the ground. where am i who am i. will i ever know the truth, will i ever understand... completely. partial truths mix with lies, illusions are born.


my head hurts, why do we feel why do our sences reel. everything seems so strange. who am i to say? who am i? am i me or am i someone else entirely is this delusion illusion or truth? i feel so strange as i think this must be true. what is life without you? what is life without truth, do you life if you do not feel so should i let my sences reel? what is it to be real? i let waves wash over me i feel them flow through me everything is energy. i feel! and it feels nice to just be, to just let it wash through me. why do i guard what is there to fear it is all energy it is all beauty. it is all wondor why can't i ever stay. i wish to stay in this place between i wish to stay in this place of wonder. why am i called back what is there to do, what is there to proove! nothing it is all wonder it is all beauty. it is all pain... it is all LOVE... and that is why i stay, love and beauty creation hope! for the beauty of it all for the wonder, for the surprises.

today i was told to marry someone because it would make it easier for everyone else if i did

why do i cry?