My last entry left a little bit too much to people imaginations. So I wanted to clear things up.... I can't leave Gaia. Not I won't... I can't. I would hate to lose all of the friends I have made over the past two years... I would really then feel like my time here was wasted because I have accomplished nothing. The last place I was... before Gaia... I was a mod. Yeah, it was small... but I still accomplished something. When it went down I was heartbroken, but not to lost... I found a place here on Gaia.
All I have done here is make friends... while that is an acomplishment.... still... I can't leave before I make a thread or a guild that makes people happy. I can't just leave. I'm selfish I guess... my time to leave a mark passed me by 3 months ago. Closest I will ever be... but that was my fault. I can't leave while I'm feeling down about Gaia... I can't leave with regrets. I have to leave once it closes, or I feel I have done all that I can. I'm not nearly there yet.
Somehow, somehow it feels like all the time that I hoped to be a mod or helper was wasted on that wishing. I came to terms with that awhile ago... but the feelings are still there... While I know I can not have that dream, I can still make Gaia a better place by being me no? Sure I won't help as much... or as many people... but I can still make people smile by being silly no? Being me is fun, I should get away from being bitter and just move on. ^__^
I couldn't bring my PC in today because Robert our old computer guy has all of our system programs... so it may be a day to a week before I can get those from him and have my PC fixed. ^__^ But once that is done I won't be nearly as stressed because I'll have a working PC.
I'm sorry for all the cheese and oddness... but its how I feel. ^__^;;
And just because I like to know who reads my journal, if possible could you comment just so I can see? You don't really have to comment on the entry if you don't feel like you have something you can say, but just post something. ^__^
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Fluffy pink happy time~~
My journal hedder broke. ;o;
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Demon Kairos
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Pannerz Community Member 
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Gynne
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Lost Prince
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Demon Kairos Community Member 
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Cativa Carni
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moonscout Community Member 
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I'm really glad your not leaving! gonk
^ I read that as "I couldn't bring my PC in today because Robert, our old computer, is gay" for some reaon. >.<