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I had a conversation a while ago with a friend, and I've been thinking on it a lot.
She said that I had changed, since about the time that I met Wijo. I remember that. She said that I was more serious, more distant. I agree with that. And I think the reason is that I'm not naive anymore.
I don't think that everything is sunshine and gumdrops. I don't try so hard to make everybody around me happy. I savor every moment I get. I learn from everything I do, and I actually make sure to not make a mistake twice. I look at things differently. I smile when I want to, not when I think that other people need me to. I understand the gravity of certain situations. I don't give my heart freely anymore; you must earn my love, and trust.
I have changed in many ways, and I have striven to make myself a better person. Not for anyone else, but because I want to be better. I changed what I was unhappy with myself about. I fixed what I did not like, refined what I thought needed it, and let my favorite aspects shine more brightly.
Yeah, I'm still airheaded. Yeah, I'm still scatterbrained. Yeah, I still can't figure out that common sense thing. But I'm living happily, the way I want to. I'm not trying to bend to anyone else's expectations anymore. I live for me, and for the ones I love, and no others. I don't have to make everyone happy.