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thanks to kassie i've realized alot of things.
Well first of all that i don't need a guy o be happy. i mean being single kicks a**! and that i should more focus on being me and happy with my life that be focused on just being able to be happy with a guy.
Two. well that it hurts to see your long time crush go out with your ex best friend but that pain'll end sometime...and he's not the only guy...but never let him out of my sight.
three. just wait. time will take it's course and eventually you'll have everything. eventually i'll have that guy...but i have to wait.
but mostly that i just have to live for me and be a happy as i can. i'll only be happy then. 'm not there yet...but i'll be there someday.