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I have done something so stupid that it is killing me inside. I feel like there is nothing that I can do to fix what I did. I hurt the one most important to me (you know who you are.) and it needs a public apology. I am so sorry for what I did. you are the most amazing person that ever lived to forgive me for something so terrible. there is one thing that was good that came from what happened- I realized that when you say you love me you actually truly mean it. that is such a hard concept for me to grasp. I thought for sure our last kiss was our last. it tore me up inside, but I couldn't hide it. I couldn't avoid it, I couldn't not tell you. it still hurts to think of what I did, and I think it always will. it was tearing me apart when I was nowhere near you to tell you. now that you know, I'm sure I don't deserve you. I love you so much and there is no way to describe what you mean to me. you are my entire world. not in the way that people say that as often as they say 'I love you' and barely mean it, but in the way that you actually are everything I have. I'm rambling. I'll talk to you later, I just thought that I would try and get into words how I feel. I love you so much. heart