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what Matt said to me...(I love him so)
Australia



One second.

That was all it took.

To bind me to you forever.

And that was it.

You are the center of the universe.

For me.

You and me forever.

No matter what a stark contrast we are.

You are my entire world, the sky that I look up too, the ground beneath my feet, the air that I breathe.

Even that is not enough to describe you.

You are my entire world, the Earth. And I'm the Moon, small as I may be, but I'm the only one who would follow you wherever you go, circling around you as your satellite, trying to brighten up your night even when I have s**t all of a light.

But even more than that, you are the Sun, and I am Mercury, smallest I may be amongst all your followers, I am the planet closest to you, revolving around you, yet nothing compared to your infinite light.

Because when you crash and burn, others drift away, slowly further, but I'm still the closest.

Even if you never see me.

Even if you never acknowledge my existence.

I couldn't put up a fight for myself, but for you I'd put up with whatever until the very last drop of my blood.

And now, whatever the situation, no matter how dangerous it is, or how stupid and futile it is, I'd foolishly follow you.

Because I've been your slave since day one.

Use me, abuse me all you want. Because not being your tool is worse than death, and all the pain or suffering is so nothing compared to the reward of being alongside you.

What more could I want, really?

I know that I mean nothing to you right now, in fact, nothing means as much to you as beating Neiar to get to Kira. That was all you were born to do, and all you ever will strive for until the end.

And if I have to mow the lawn of an entire football field with a nail clipper or face Kira with nothing but a plushie, I'd do it.

For you, anything.

Mello.

The name that sounds more heavenly than anything.

You with your black leather wrapping your lithe figure, the scar on your face that fails to ruin your beautiful face, and your constant chocolate-eating compulsion.

Your voice, your smell, your taste, everything that I know so well.

Mello.

Everything I could do right now, I'd do it. And ironically, that was the least I could do.

So here I am, speeding along the highway with our sedan, ready for the kill.

I did everything you told me to do.

Messing up the group of Takada's bodyguard was anything but trouble, and admittedly, the gas bomb was the fun part.

"Traitor!!" I heard them shouting outside.

I even had the radio on.

Amidst the chaos, the Takada girl panicked as her pathetic bodyguards scrambled around trying to protect her.

And it wasn't long before you caught up with your black cruiser, disguised as the saviour of the day, a leather-clad saint in black. Coming up from behind me, your remark was short but sharp.

"I'll take from here, Matt."

In a rush, the little wench climbed on the back of your cruiser, clinging to you almost instantly, dazed and confused.

And then off you went in a flash.

"I'll take it from here, Matt."

When you say my name, every single cell of my body smiles, and my soul lie basking in bliss.

"Matt, I need you to…"

And when you need me, my every being sings in drunk euphoria.

From L.A to New York, from New York to Japan, the world seemed so small. Even Pluto didn't seem that far away.

If I had to follow you to the end of the universe, you know I will.

So here I am. Never once regretting anything. The front line of your defense, horror and death waiting to engulf me, but I'm laughing inside.

I wonder where your location is at the moment. I just hope that wench doesn't give you too much trouble.

But for you nothing is ever too much trouble, is it? You'd shut anyone up if you want them to, 'cause you always get what you want. Don't you?

And so take whatever you want from me.

A chase was building fast, a brigade of guards tailing behind me, speeding sharp like a hungry predator locating its prey.

I thought, what took you bozos so long?

I was beginning to get bored, thinking it couldn't come any sooner.

Because I knew that today was the day.

If my life ended here, I wouldn't mind. At least it was for you.

Instinctively, as if it wasn't dramatic enough, I turned the radio volume up, and the interior instantly vibrated along with the beat.

With old-school indie rock blaring out of the sound system, I led the chase like a maniac.

Today was going to be the downfall of a front line rebel.

And it's all for you, babe.

The music changed into something familiar.

Hey, I know this one. It's Manics, the Welsh band who was big in the 90s.

/I don't know if I'm tired and I don't know if I'm ill/

As the first verse kicked in, I lit up another cigarette.

And one by one, memories started to unfold.

From that first meeting again, after hell knows how long.

It was you, unmistakably you with that burn mark across your face, but your mouth was still munching on your delectable treat.

/My cheeks are turning yellow, I think I'll take another pill/

I turned my attention back into the road for a second.

And from the corner of my eye, I saw a 2002 red Honda Integra from the opposite direction cruising by beside me.

What a beauty. 8 years old and it was hot as ever.

Remember that, Mel?

That was our first car. Our car. And it was the exact same colour. Flashy, skanky, but for some reason, when you're driving it, it's all class.

I vividly remember the look on your face when we first jumped in it. As expected, I let you drive.

"Let's ride this b***h like a real b***h."

"Fancy that."

Just like how I let you take control of my life. And I enjoyed the free ride like no other.

There was cigarettes, lots of chocolate, and lots of sex too.

I'd never forget our red Integra. I wonder where she is now.

Loud screeching engine came up from behind interrupting my thoughts, and I sped up like a maniac.

/Praying for the wave to come now/

If you're gonna catch me, do it right, morons.

Because after this, I don't know what awaits us.

I'd rather they bust me and finish me off than not knowing when I'm gonna see you next.

Because after this mission, convinced as I may be that you'll always somehow manage to find me, I can't stand the uncertainty.

Or the wait.

/It must be for the fifteenth time/

Fifteen.

I remembered one time, for some reason, we were so off our heads that it happened fifteen times.

No kidding.

Fifteen times.

Sex with you is like no other.

The ravishing bliss, the intensity, the roughness, the…pain.

It was more real than anything.

If I had to make love to you until my whole body wears out I would. Breathing isn't all that important anyway.

/I've been here for much too long/

With you it was never too long.


/This is the past that's mine/

Mello, I love you like no other.

And with that, our pasts together, memories of you, it's all mine.

Mine.

Forever.

Mello…

I could never get enough.

It felt like ages away, but only a few nights ago, we were one.

There was only our room, me and you, naked and perfect in my arms.

Sometimes, you would cling to me for ages and refused to let me go, not even to let me light up a f**.

Sometimes you couldn't wait to be rid of me and do your own thing.

Always unpredictable, always keeping me guessing.

But the sex is always incredible.

And it always somehow made me feel invincible.

Like now.

The world around me spins into a blur while the car I drove cut through it at what felt like light speed.

Then I realised.

I missed you already.

It was like no matter how fast I was going, it wasn't enough to fill the void only you can fill.

I know it's stupid.

I know it's bollocks.

But I couldn't help it.

Taking another drag, catching a glimpse of the rear mirror, the world speed past me at 200 km/hour.

Everything disappeared into oblivion until all I had in my head was you.

/I want to fly and run 'til it hurts…/ </o:p>

Fancy that.

Come to think of it, there's so many things I still want to do.

Mello…

When all this is over, and we get out of it alive, I want to take you far away.

Away from this city, away from the continent, this whole Northern hemisphere.

/Sleep for a while and speak no words…/

Somewhere where no one knows us, no Kira, no SPK, none of that s**t.

Just the two of us.

/In Australia…/

That's it.

Let's go to Australia.

Oh, that place is wicked.

Have you ever been there, Mel?

You probably have – someone like you must have been around the world.

Australia, yeah, that's it, Australia.

I want to go there with you.

I've been there once. Down south, in a state called, Victoria, that's right, Victoria.

Everything is so alien there, it was like a totally different planet.

The land, the sky, the weather…

I remember going there in December and it was summer.

The people there speak weird English with even weirder accents.

But it was brilliant.

We could go there together, oh, we could have so much fun.

I've been to the capital, it's called Melbourne.

A cute little town, and I don't even normally use the word "cute".

/I want to fly and run 'til it hurts…/

/Sleep for a while and speak no words…/

/In Australia…/

/In Australia…/

We could go to the capital, oh, you're going to love it there.

Especially the nightlife.

We could go down Southbank, this gorgeous riverside complex in the heart of Melbourne, all the way down to the end of the river – and go all the way back up again.

Or we could laze around the Botanical Gardens not far from it.

I could just see it in my mind.

Me and you at the Botanical Gardens.

I could just lie there for hours, feeling the cool grass digging into my skin and whenever I look up, you will be sitting there, blocking the radiating sun over me.

Or we could cruise down the countrysides with your bike, just the two of us, from one highway to another – checking out the coastal region. Hell, we could even go to Sydney for all I care – jumping from one state to another.

Oh, it'll be brilliant.

I can't wait to take you there.

/Praying for the wave to come now…/

They're getting closer and closer.

But my brain refused to let go of your image.

Instead, it took me further away to one of our first nights together.

It wasn't long after the freak "accident" that burnt almost half your body.

There you were, lying on your stomach with only your leather pants on.

Sometimes you would complain of a backache, shoulder ache or whatever, and without further explanation, I'd automatically go up to offer you a massage.

I swear I get high everytime I touch you.

The skin on your back is ivory perfect, the intact parts overshadowing the scarred parts. I could only imagine how it must've hurt like hell when you first got the burn.

It was one of those moments that seep easily into the core of my very soul.

/It must be for the very last time…/

When the knots on your back slowly relax, as if melting in my hands, followed by the purring bliss that escape your mouth, I just can't hold back.

Sometimes you would welcome me jumping on you, sometimes you'd just push me off the bed.

Yeah, you treat me like s**t sometimes. But I wouldn't want it any other way.

Because it's just you.

And I doubt it if you know, but sometimes during those nights when I'm hacking codes with my head buried in gadgets, I'd steal glances of you sleeping.

A perfect picture in the calm of night, your blonde strands covering half your face as you breathe quietly.

Mello…

I could just stare at you for hours.

And then I'd get totally distracted.

So I just watch you sleep.

Until I fall asleep myself.

Wondering not for the very first time if you ever dream of me.

And then on one of those nights, you'd wake up at ridiculous times, demanding some.

And we'd ******** like rabbits for hours sometimes.

Like I'd mind.

I've missed you.

I've missed you like mad I could just die if I don't get to see you again.

Mello...

Screeching brakes brought me out of it for a second.

The highway was almost clear now, and I've got a little chance of escape.

That is assuming all of Takada's army of bodyguards were behind me.

/It's twelve o'clock 'til midnight…/

There was never a midnight like our midnights together.

Mello, I wish you were here right now.

I knew last night was probably going to be the last time ever.

/There must be someone to blame…/

But it was that particular midnight that carved its memories so deeply within me.

It was another one of those midnights again, where everything was perfect, the dim lighting, our comfortable bed, the intimate smell in the air while I was sucking on my cigarette and you were lying beside me, half-naked, licking you chocolate repeatedly before devouring it greedily.

I was about to run my fingers along the curve of your spine when you suddenly turned to face me, peering at me with your intense eyes, as if trying to penetrate right through me.

Don't stop looking.

"Mello?"

And then you said something that sounded more beautiful than anything.

'If one of us is going to be killed by Kira, then I promise it would be me."

To me, no declaration of love ever existed can come close to that one.

/I want to fly and run 'til it hurts…/

I must've been stunned like an idiot for quite a while because you started looking at me strangely, searching my eyes in a "hey are you alright?" kind of way.

/Sleep for a while and speak no words…/

Taking a final drag, I reluctantly returned his stare, like a teenager dumbfounded caught perving at his major crush.

/In Australia…/

Pathetically brushing off the awkward silence, I quickly caught your lips in mine.

I kissed you repeatedly like there was no tomorrow. Our breaths hitched together, desperately reaching for more oxygen.

"Matt…"

It was awkward alright, but it was so damn good.

"Matt...ahm..."

Probably our last kiss ever.

/Aaaah…Australia…/

Until now. Even when my life was hanging by a thread, mercilessly dragged by the speeding chase that seemed neverending.

/In Australia…/

But I knew this was going nowhere.

For a second there, Australia seemed so close.

That little heaven of you and me.

Forever.

And then...

"Gugh!"

A few black sedans started taking over from the front, completely blocking me.

Oh, ********.

"Those cars were laying in wait!"

I knew I was being overly optimistic assuming they weren't prepared to surround the whole area.

Or the whole damn suburb, for all I know.

"Just how many bodyguards does Takada have?"

Here it comes.

And before I knew it, a barricade of black sedans formed a circle around me.

I had no choice but to come to a complete stop.

You and me…forever.

I was surrounded.

Matt...I need you to...

So now, this is for you, Mello.

There was no way out.

But I was prepared.

Whatever today may bring, I knew I'd take it all for you.

I heard the clicking of a firearm, so I thought, "Alright."

"Time to put up another smokescreen."

/I want to fly and run 'til it hurts.../

Taking a last drag, I climbed out of my car.

"Wait a minute, wait a minute, since when have the Japanese been allowed to carry such nice guns?"

Bring it on.

Taunting out loud, treating it like a joke, I declared in the "hey guess what" kind of way, "I'm an accomplice in the kidnapping of Takada."

A uniform sound of numerous guns clicking echoed in the background.

This is it.

This is goodbye.

"Don't you have a bunch of questions to ask me? What's the point in firing..."

And then there were guns blaring.

But strangely enough, all I heard was the music still playing in the background blaring out of my car.

/Sleep for a while and speak no words...in Australia.../

Goodbye, Mello.

"If one of us is going to be killed by Kira, then I promise that would be me."

/In Australia.../

/In Australia.../

/In Australia.../






User Comments: [1] [add]
BeautifulDarknessAwaits
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Tue Mar 04, 2008 @ 08:10pm
so much boy love heart heart crying


User Comments: [1] [add]
 
 
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