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Why do you torment me so? This conundrum of life's spectacles beseech me to make ever present a path for others to tred their feet upon so as to trample me to the ground, thine black roses so beautiful to behold yet so painful to be set upon hath crowned me like a king on the mound of human feces, never shall I rise up from this stench as it overwhelms me so.

I hate s**t. People's s**t mostly... and today that is exactly what I had to put up with as I was forced by my employers to clean up mess after mess of people who couldn't manage to aim their derrière in the proper direction so as to ejaculate their feces in the toilet bowl as opposed to the seat, underside of the lid, beneath the bowl and on the ground around the toilet while managing to get as little as possible of the actual projectile into the bowl itself, and then as though to add insult to injury they insisted upon not flushing, making my job THAT much more enjoyable.