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Ugh, I feel so depressed and nervous that I can't sleep right now. I bought a bunch of posters from the poster sale at my campus and I didn't realize that I'd forgotten them until I got home. I hope I can get them back. I e-mail the prof and that's all I can do for now.

The most pressing problem for me right now is my Organic Chem midterm this friday. I have to at least pass it, if I bomb, then I'll have to drop it. I really want to do well on this test, I've already put a ton of effort into it. Gotta meet my group about a project in conservation biology, we're still rather disorganized. I have to work this weekend in the mornings on Saturday and Sunday, at least I get my paycheque this week. Also have another major paper due in 2 weeks for my Field Ecology course, which I don't understand that well despite spending much of my day in class listening to the prof telling us what to do, because I was very tired. I was tired for much of the day, but now that I'm home, I can't fall asleep. I hate my biological clock right now, it's seriously ******** up. I guess all I can do right now is wait until I'm tired enough to fall asleep.

Peter promised he'd take me out partying on Friday night. Guess I'll have to catch a few hours sleep before work on Saturday. I'm scoping out where to apply for a better job. I'm hoping that the longer I try and tolerate this awful job, the more I'll be motivated to get a better one. Ontario Science Center, Toronto Zoo and a Hospital are currently my main choices.

I was also wrapped up in this book I bought and read. The Concubine's Children by Denise Chong. Got it for 50 cents at the book sale at my campus. I always comb through sales there, it's amazing what you can find. The paperback is about 7 dollars at the store.

I didn't feel dizzy from donating blood on monday, but my arm did get kinda bruised today. The nurse had said no to do heavy activity, but I hadn't thought that lifting my backpack counted. At least I didn't faint or anything.

I can't help but keep thinking about what to do after I graduate. Part of my wants to run all over the world, volunteer for developing nations at the red cross and save the environment while working on a Ph.D. Another part of me wants to find a quiet job, marry some okay guy who's neither rich or poor, handsome or ugly and settle down with 2 kids and a dog. I don't know what I'm going to do, I just think of the saying "Wharever you go, there you are".

I'm seriously considering several options. I know the military is desperate for people, so I could join them as a medic. Though that could get gruesome, gruesome's not my thing. I was also thinking of being a high school science teacher. I heard the funding's terrible in the U.S., but there's a demand for them and it pays well in Canada. There's a lot of teachers colleges in Australia, so I would have an excuse to go there. But I don't know much about Australia and I've never been on my own for any long period of time, so I don't know how well I'd do halfway around the world by myself in a country that has lots of nice creatures that can poison me, sting me and generally ruin my day.

I'll think of something.