So in my bf Sam's journal, he posted an entry which vaguely sounded like he was going to break up with me. I posted a comment asking pretty calmly if he was. I verified later that he was NOT breaking up with me, but saying something along the lines of 'If I think I can't love her the best, then I might as well let her move on.' However, it was a general statement of his beliefs. So this comment was posted right after mine...by someone who will stay anonymous for now, because they know who they are, and so do I. And to tell the truth this made me pretty damn pissed off. And I mean pissed.
Anonymous
BOO ******** HOO YOURE BREAKING UP THATS ******** LIFE DEAL WITH IT THERES NOT A DAMN THING THAT YOU CAN ******** DO ABOUT IT SO JUST SUCK IT UP AND MOVE ON IN YOUR ******** LIFE!!! WHAT DID YOU THINK THAT HE WAS GOING TO LOVE YOU AND STAY WITH YOU?!? ******** NO!!!! HES A ******** BOY AND DO YOU THINK THAT THEY EVEN KNOW WHAT THE ******** LOVE IS?!?!?!? THEY HAVE NO ******** IDEA, NONE WHAT-SO-EVER!!!! THEY DONT KNOW HOW THEY ******** INFLUENCE PEOPLE, THEY HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH PAIN WE ARE IN BECAUSE OF THEM, HE DOESNT KNOW WHAT THE ******** HE WANTS IN LIFE 'CAUSE HES TOO MUCH OF A p***y TO REACH OUT AND GRAB IT! THIS IS ******** HIGH SCHOOL DO YOU THINK A HIGH SCHOOL BOY KNOWS WHAT THE ******** HE WANTS IN LIFE?!? HE HAS NO ******** CLUE, AND HE NEVER WILL 'CAUSE HE CANT MAKE UP HIS MIND AND IN THE END HES JUST GONA HURT A LOT OF ******** PEOPLE AND HE HIMSELF IS GOING TO BE SO ******** UNHAPPY ILL BE SURPRIZED IF HE DOESNT SHOOT HIMSELF IN THE FACE! SO SUCK IT UP, HE DOESNT LOVE YOU; HE DOESNT LOVE A SINGLE ******** PERSON, NO ONE! HE JUST LOVES HIS ******** HAND BECAUSE IT DOESNT TALK BACK TO HIM AND IT CANT LOVE HIM BACK!!!!!!!!!!
So the first question on my mind was 'What the hell? Who wrote this?!' And I found out. So I'm pretty angry and confused and insulted, and generally a big ball of strong emotion. First of all, there are a couple of things I would like to tell the audience:
1.) No relationship in high school is meant to/supposed to last FOREVER. If they do, then that's all the better. But most of high school is finding out your likes and dislikes, testing the waters of the Relationship Ocean, so to speak. Basically, high school is meant to prepare you for the world romantically as well as academically.
2.) I don't think anyone in High School, let alone a high school boy, knows EXACTLY what they want. Saying none of them know is a little extreme, since they probably have a vague idea, but I will admit even I don't know what I want to do with my life.
3.) I know that guys are less knowledgable than girls with the whole 'Relationship' thing, but they are not so dumb that they have no clue. They may not know exactly what love is, but is there a strict definition? No. And anyways, I doubt even girls know what love is. Especially not at a young age, like a high schooler.
Now I direct myself at the person who left that comment, if they happen to be reading this. Which I find very unlikely.
If you have so much aggression towards boys, and you have these opinions, chances are that you are going to end up very unhappy yourself. You need to keep an open mind about everyone, and even if you are hurt, you need to either give another chance, or move on. I'm not saying that I disagre with everything you said. In fact we both agree that moving on is a good thing. However, I was mostly confused, not upset, about the whole situation. If Sam decided he WAS going to break up with me, which he did not, I would have accepted that with dignity. I am not one to beg for someone back. Nor am I one to pine for years over someone who I am no longer dating. I realize that life is life, and whatever decisions others make, I can only make my own. I cannot change anyone else, only myself.
And I realize you probably think I'm preaching... or whatever. But honestly, I have no clue why you decided to vent your frustration like you did. It amazes me how easily people can just write anything on the internet, click send, and think it's okay. If you honestly have a problem with me, in any way at all, I just want to say that I will NOT work it out so... distantly, over the internet. You can either come to me in person, or I will come to you. And believe me, if angry comments and mesages like this continue, I WILL come to you.
