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83 Ways to Say You Raped a Guy:
(1895-Present)

Took his Cabbage
Stole his Pickle
Plundered his Pineapple
Put a little Belgian in It
Pulled a Ziegfried
Murpheyed
Toured a Poultry Factory
Ate Mackerel
The Old Spanish Lunchboat
Golden Pork
Met your friend Mr. Pembroke at His Home in North Westfordshire
The Thermonuclear Poke
Bubblegum Puppy
Haystack Relations
Pie
Boysenberry Surprise
Peter Quimble
Strategic Nelson
Felt a bit Choppish
Portly Feeling
Gnarly Whorl
All Six Nickels
Jeff
Big Chunks of Smile
Churlish Kindness
Doggedly Went Down Barley Street
Filled a Prescription for Fresh
Spicy Gamble
Nibbled on Chaff
The Purple Scarf
Hunted Barley
Caught Pink
Happy Trails Below
Wish no More
J.J. Westerton
A Funky Cookie
Four Birds and a Burro
Coffee, Portland Style
My Favorite Buffalo
Hair on the Front Bit
To Err on the Side of Wig
Jumpin' Cheese Sammitch!
Bill Dawes' Revenge
Hopeful Potpourri
Song and Dance, with a little alfalfa on top
The Greenish Tango
Over the Teddy
Too Much Peanut Butter
A Gay Night in Marseille
Chapter Eight: The Reckoning
Fore, Aft, Starboard, but not Port
A Most Challenging Fish
Comic Hijinx
I'm the Hell out of Turkey
King-sized Parsley
The Cheap Vinney
Dinner and a Movie and Dinner
All Parts of the Monkey
Dutch Economics
The Chair Market
How they do it in Prague
Capitalism
Nows the Time! Not so much the place
¡Hola! ¿Cual es la fecha?
String Cheese
Mr. Richard Franks, 1628 Parkwood Place, Newberry, Connecticut 15783
Red hair, Blue Eyes
Doc's on the Phone
Helpful Change
The Wild Southeast
Seventy-Seven Eights
Sweater Polish
Scowling While Smiling
Charity Pile
Santa Claus' Hat
Fair Trade Waffles
A Bridge over a Dry River
The Big Splash
The Belarus Gambit
What the Japanese call "Getsu"
Warming up your Stapler
Shep