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I was thinking and when i get older and look back on my youth, what will i think of it?
...
and what is death like?
...
sometimes i just want to kill myself...i mean, don't get me wrong, i'm pretty happy, i have good friend, and i have a good family but i just want to kill myself, just to see what it's like.
what death holds for me.
i don't really have a religion, i don't perticularly think there's a heaven or hell or we get reicarnated or something like that
but i don't believe that any of that is impossible

but even if i wanted to know so much that i deciced to kill myself to find out...
i couldn't
i know icmouldn't becuase i would also be so scared to and then i wouldn't know what i could have been, if i went on to live out my life as a full and let death take me when it pleased...

i do want to know...but not that much...