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Today, I spent the day at my dad's house. Which I don't really injoy beacuse my dad is deppressed right now because he just broke up with his girl friend. He comes to me for advice i hate it. I mean I'm only thirteen, hes a baby. I don't blame it on him you can't blame people for raising you the wrong way because they weren't raised right. Well everything was ok because he wasn't here today. Evn though my dad was gone my day was bab because i had a very unsettleing dream last night. in my dream, they found out that I was crazy, and they took me to a hospital and put me in a room to talk to this lady. I don't know who she is but she kind of seems inportant, any way, I'm very scared of getting cought I know that nothing like my dreams will happen but I'm scared anyway. So in my dream I wanted to escape, I ran out of the room and I ran and ran but that lady kept folling me. She almost cought me so many times, I just barelly got away. Then I woke up I I didn't cry because I was afraid they would think I was a wimp.

I know their not real but they feel real. Have you ever felt like you are being watched? That's what I feel like all the time, I feel like my chris might stab me with a pen when I'm not looking, I feel unsafe. Mostly i feel like I;m being watched and they are very judgemental. i'm not comfertable with my lifestyle because of them.

Makena is my best friend hes younger than me and he has a boyfriend or not I'm not sure right now he just broke up wiht mark. I guess you could call him emo. I told him that I thought people watched me and he luaghed at me he said I was lying. I felt very hurt and angry I thought about not being his friend anymore. But I like him so I decided I would Agree with him and tell him that I was just making a joke. I hope you don't think I'm lying that would hurt too. Chris believes me though he always does Im very glad he's my brother, Im gald hes my twin.

well im going to go buy a snowman suit. this has made me kind of sad so Im not going to write for the moment.

bye, :@ ali