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“I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out.”
S-a-t-u-r-d-a-y Night!
"Saturday, in the park.. I think it was the 4th of july."

Weekend bargain hunting led me to a new laptop, which in turn led me to beating my head against the wall for most of the weekend trying to get the damn thing working properly.

Specs:
Sony Vaio
PIII 700mhz speedstep
256MB ram
10gb HDD
dvd/cd drive

Nice little machine, but the dvd/cd drive won't read cd's. So, that led to a host of issues getting the thing updated and on my network. So, 100$ later it's running happily along.. finally. Thanks to my agnostic gods that I snagged a USB disc on key. Saved my digital butt on this one.

The item update brings kilts, and that's always a good thing. Easy access rates high in my book, for both men and women. I mean, who wants to deal with zippers and buttons when nookie is eminent? Just lift and play. Mind you, to properly wear a kilt, you need good legs, and a reilience to updrafts.

Spiders.. ewww. I'm arachnophobic, so the donation item is a wee bit creepy. The idea of a giant spider clinging to my chest or back gives me the willies something fierce. Luckily, my avatar is not biased to 8-legged beasties, nor is he vulnerable to giant spider venom. He's hardcore like that.

Sisky: pic is eminent, just waiting for the scabs to clear. They itch terribly.

Dropkick Murphys - "Spicy McHaggis"

I'll tell you a story, believe me it's true
a tale you'd best hope never happens to you
old spicy mcHaggis,
how he met his fate,
you I can save, but for him it's too late

Spicy was big, burly and strong his pipes were gigantic,
and so was his schlong!
from city to city running around looking for chicks over four hundred pounds

One night at the pub a girl caught his eye
big as a house,
just the right size,
the broad was enormous,
stacked to the hilt
spicy soon noticed a bulge in his kilt
the piper delivered his best pick-up line
thought to himself,
"this beast is all mine"
the portly young lady could stand for no more
grabbed his cojones and went for the door

They got to her house and dimmed all the lights
Spicy was in for one hell of a night
he said that he loved her,
he'd always be true
"But Mr. McHaggis, I've only just met you!!"

By now he saw double through his drunken eyes
neither had looks or appropriate size
he came to his sense,
thought to himself, "At this time of night I won't find nothing else"
he took off his shirt,
she lifted her skirt,
they pulled out his unit and stared to play
she asked for a glove,
he gave her a shove,
had baby McHaggis nine months to-the-day.

Three packs a day, he'll smoke 'til he dies
Spicy McHaggis, one hell of a guy!

I don't know what you all are talking about.. And who drank all my beer?!?!


Twistex
Community Member
  • [07/13/09 05:33pm]
  • [06/02/09 06:10pm]
  • [03/22/09 10:50pm]
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  • [04/23/08 07:35pm]
  • [04/01/08 07:31pm]
  • [02/27/08 05:46pm]
  • [01/04/08 11:02pm]
  • [12/10/07 04:08am]
  • [12/06/07 08:15pm]


  • User Comments: [4]
    <center>Kilts are a plus. Definately. Why else would my Twiggaterp want me in one? xD Or a skirt for that matter.

    The whole leg things of the donation letters aren't actually spider based. Spiders have eight legs and these have six. And I share the same fear as you. whee


    comment TheEveoftheNight · Community Member · Mon Apr 25, 2005 @ 05:33pm
    Scabs? What scabs?

    comment 454Fifteen · Community Member · Tue Apr 26, 2005 @ 04:45am
    710: Tattoo scabs.

    comment Twistex · Community Member · Tue Apr 26, 2005 @ 02:43pm
    twistex you rock my socks whee

    comment Heartagram · Community Member · Tue Apr 26, 2005 @ 07:19pm
    User Comments: [4]

     
     
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