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My sick twisted life....
just done with it all.
What do I do when I get hurt every time I let my feelings out those very few times towards people I like or care about. I get rid of them. If I have no feelings then I cant get hurt. I only loved once in my life and it hurt me so so very much. Ive only told 2 girls after that how I felt towards them. Both turned there backs on me and walked away. Those are the only times I let my feelings come out about anyone. I cant stand to be alive, why must I live . How come all those times ive tried to kill myself over the past 3 yrs never worked. Why is it that I must be alone and not have one person to hold in my arms. Thats all I wanted this year was someone to hold In my arms tightly and forgot about all my problems in the world as if nothing was wrong. All I wanted was someone I could stare at all day long and never get sick of it. All I wanted was to be able to curl up on the couch with that person lying up against my stomach in my arms as we watched a movie. All I wanted was someone who I could just run away to when I couldnt handle it anymore . Some to except me for me and not judge me for the way I look. But thats something I guess ill never experience. A someone is what Im not allowed to a have. I'm not or forever will be good enough for anyone . Thats why I gave up , just gave up . And now for the 10 yrs I wait until that night my heart disease takes me away. That will be the happiess day of my life , when all the pain and wondering is gone.





non_excisting
Community Member
non_excisting
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  • [07/11/07 03:53pm]
  • [07/04/07 05:24am]

  • User Comments: [2] [add]
    xXxPrincessBrokenHeartxXx
    Community Member
    avatar
    commentCommented on: Sun Jul 15, 2007 @ 06:27am
    omg u almost made me cry aw u shouldnt think so badly becuse if u do then it might be hard to find when somthing good dose come along and u well never know


    so be happy and smile
    biggrin biggrin biggrin
    hehe am such a happy person
    so u should be happy to
    life is full of pain life is full of happenes
    but what ever may come there are a million ppl who got ur back
    but the funny thing is u well never know thoughs ppl


    RAWRS
    commentCommented on: Sun Jul 22, 2007 @ 06:58pm
    wow...thats really sad. jeez, thats depressing. I'm sure that there is someone out there ,just get out, talk to people, and you'll find someone. heart



    Zada Karasu
    Community Member
    User Comments: [2] [add]
     
     
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