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I feel kind of guilty right now. Today in the store Dustin made me mad over something stupid. And then I wouldn't speak to him for a while. It's just sometimes the way he talks to me is rude. And sometimes he just makes me feel so insignificant, and blows off what I'm saying.

It's like what I have to say doesn't really matter to him. Like I'm annoying, or something. And sometimes I just feel pathetic next to him. He's better than me at almost everything. He's smarter, he's more sociable, he can even get along with my family better than I can. His family is so much better off than mine that I'm almost embarrassed when he comes over because there's nothing I can offer him to eat. And at times I feel like I'm the cause of all of our problems.

And I want to change myself and be confident and smart like he is, but I don't know how. I wasn't blessed with beauty or brains. I was blessed with an amazing guy who has no reason to be attracted to me but he still is.

Dustin, I wish I could measure up to you...