i'm so confused right nw. i seriously don't know what to do. i don't want to leave, but if these are the actions and things being said then i don't want to be here and that hurts and i don't know what hurts more, saying that or feeling like that. and like i know you can't help your feelings and whatever but it still hurts and i don't know what to do about it. i don't know. i just needed to post that. let it out. later
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