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If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you a house (I would buy you a house)
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you furniture for your house (maybe a nice chesterfield or ottoman)
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you a K-car (a nice Reliant automobile)
If I had a million dollars
I'd buy your love

If I had a million dollars
I'd build a tree fort in our yard
If I had a million dollars
You could help, it wouldn't be that hard
If I had a million dollars
Maybe we could put a refrigerator in there
Wouldn't that be fabulous?

If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you a fur coat (but not a real fur coats that's cruel)
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you an exotic pet (like a llama or an emu)
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you John Merrick's remains (all them crazy elephant bones)
If I had a million dollars
I'd buy your love

If I had a million dollars
We wouldn't have to walk to the store
If I had a million dollars
We'd take a limousine ‘cause it costs more
If I had a million dollars
We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner
But we would. We'd actually make the treefort from the first chorus out of it. Mmmm
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you a green dress (but not a real green dress that's cruel)
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you some art (a Picasso or a Garfunkel)
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you a monkey (haven't you always wanted a monkey?)
If I had a million dollars
I'd buy your love

If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd be rich.