This is freaking Hilarious but you have to read all of it to get it!
E-mail for today
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Husband:
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good.
I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.
These last two weeks have been hell, so that's when I made plans to leave you forever.
Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw.
I knew that I had to leave right now.
Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done,
cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee.
You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game.
You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or anything.
Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, what ever the case is, I'm gone.
PS: If you're trying to find me, don't.
Your BROTHER Carl and I are moving away to West Virginia together!
Have a great life!
Your Ex-wife.
.....The saga continues.....
Dear Ex-wife
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a
far cry from what you've been.
Its all about you, you never even thought about the kids.
All you do is complain that you want this or you want that, you think about nobody but yourself.
You don't appreciate any thing that I do for you, yet you gush all over my lying, cheating,
womanizing brother.
I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging.
Too bad that doesn't work.
I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week,
the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!"
My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice.
When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER,
because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.
I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the
price tag was still on it.
I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars
from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99.
And let's face it, you think that your a sexy thing, you used to be but for the last three years
your really boring in bed. Just about the time that you began flirting with my brother.
You've become a one trick pony with me having to do the trick.
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out.
So when I discovered that I had hit the Lottery for ten million dollars,
I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica.
But when I got home you were gone.
Everything happens for a reason I guess! I hope you have the filling
life you always wanted.
My lawyer said with the letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime
from me. So take care.
PS: I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born Carla.
He'll be more of a woman in bed than you ever dreamed you were.
I hope that's not a problem.
[Jasutiin] Community Member 
|
|
