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Dear readers,
in this day in time... i am sad....depressed... scared... frighteningly fascinated... i'm terrified that if i do something wrong somehow that my g/f will get the wrong message or i'll get something wrong or i'll kill the moment for somethingor ... GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm so mixed up i can hardly see straight.. i hate it when this happens.. i get all worked up over nothing and if ******** with my head. Damnit, why can't i be normal? wait... yea. i feel so alone. Yet she's just a phone call away. I can't call her yet cuz there's nothing t talk about. And i'm afraid she's gonna be mad at me for something or there's something she's done wrong.. She has something to tell me but she won't give me any hints or anything and won't tell me till next week. i'm so CONFUSED!!!!!!!!!!1
god... i want to collapse in a heap on the floor and cry forever. But i've done enough crying for two life times and i will never again cry over a mistake i've made. I made the worst mistake that one could make and now i am ashamed of it. well, good day everyone.

have wonderful lives.

The panther