Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

A Heart Ache,tears of blood tear from the wound and pierce my soul,I am gone,I wish I could believe that but things are easier said then done.its easier to sday you're going to die then actually dying. I wish I could become more numb just completely drown all of my emotions, to not care about a thing; My paradise, I entered a door I could never leave so many doors I am stuck here now,forever embedded in your hearts, your lives.I can't leave now I can't fade without taking a part of you away from you. I screwed myself over. I am a kind guy-no I am not,I am the kind of guy who will deceive you when you hurt and I will kick you when you are down. I have been a horrible guy and I want to disappear but no one will let me. Why will you not rid yourself of me,the disease your flaw, an imperfection, let me go kick me out of your life. I never deserved to be in it. You are good people, And I destroyed alittle part of everyone of you. The only thing I brought with my being is your pain.Say Good bye to me in the next pm you send me and if you continue to send pm's after that if you didn't mean it,I will rip myself apart by the blade of a knife in your name's sake. I will have a gash with your name written on the blade of it. -The Disease;Matthew John Yuschuk.