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I don't know what I feel. The only emotion in my head right now is honestly, 'no comment'. I care so much, so so much, but honestly I could care less. If that makes any sense. I don't know what to make of this; I feel so numb it's unbearable; but I don't feel numb, because that's a feeling and I just don't feel it. I think it'll sink in eventually... I don't know. Maybe. I hope so. Because I don't feel like I know what I'm feeling; and if I understand everyone else's feelings, how come I can't understand my own? It doesn't make any sense. I don't get it. But I'm not confused. Maybe a little curious; maybe that's the only thing I'm feeling right now. Curiosity. And maybe just loss in general... I don't know.

I really, truly, and honestly do not know.