i tried to stay out of a dramatic life, ut the only place is my house. i will go home tommorrow and try to make it last. i will try to call debbie and see if i can stay at her house. or maybe i'll just try to stay at the house and become aware of what's going on and get out more. staying here is hard work. i get degraded here just as i did at home. i don't need this. maybe it was a bad idea. next week i'll just save some money to go to my mommy and daddy's house. at least they love me for me. and i love them for them. they talk with me not at me. it takes a person to realize what they got going on. i really didn't ask for the ridicule. i asked for the help. which i did recieve, but most of the time when i need to "really unwind" is when i get ridiculed. i really need to find a ditch and bury myself in it. it is not working. i thank her for being there for me, but i really need to escape all possiblities of being anihilated. this is why i didn't want to spend the night here. i knew that any minute would lead to my demise. everything i do is not right or it's not to perfect. i might as well stay home. i can tell that i'm going to hate it.
Death At Will Community Member 
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