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wah b***h moan cry.

see i has complaints. But I won't complain about them because I don't want to be called selfish or not be called selfish and just assumed to be selfish.

I feel like I don't know anyone's actual opinions sometimes. I don't know what's going in everyone else's life. I'm concerned.

It's like.

I'm trustworthy.

but. idk.

Whatever.

and I say don't bother reading this when I actually want people to read it comfort me but whatever.

Just.

Goddammit. I feel like swearing and slamming my head against my desk.

I just don't know anymore.

I don't who's sinking or floating and I don't know whether I'm sinking or just swimming. I'm definitely not floating. Ijustdon'tknowwhat.

And these emotions will be gone tomorrow.

But will return.

And go

and return.

Just. I don't know. I don't know who's happy or sad or okay or is in trouble. And I care so ******** much.


so.um. I wonder people actually read these things. I pretty sure it's zero, nowadays. I don't think anyone actually knows how often I write these things and what about. That's okay, I'm not going to be self-absorbed enough to complain about that. But it is like. Who am I venting to? Who can I vent to? I don't think there really is anyone. I feel kind of alone right now but I feel worse because I know so many people feel so much more alone that I do. goddammit. I can't even be properly self-absorbed. I act like an a** and do a*****e things and pretend to be self-absorbed for comedic value but. I'm just so goddamn insecure. And I feel so weak when I know I'm being strong.