How could you be sad at the fact that im dead? Why? you dont need me no one needs me everyone has their own b/f-g/f or lover i have to stop here i cant think of anything else to say i only feel this great pain in my chest i feel it eating the soul i have left cant i please just die? im begging you to just let me go... IM NO GOOD!!! IM NOT NEEDED!!!! why cant you see this is only tormenting me... i cant find the happiness that i once had because i dont remember it and i doubt it ever existed do you understand? No..you dont.... you all want to have hope for me... i dont want anymore just have hope for yourself stop giving me hope so i can fall and shatter when i hit the ground...please....Lets see...at first my heart got damaged, then the next day it got scared, then the day after it was torn, then it got broken and here the final day its shattered! Why do people hurt me? why do they lie to me? its because im bad...isnt it.... im horrible rotten and no good im ugly im stupid im bothersome im annoying im a disaster really I want to cry! i want to scream! i want to bleed! i just want to die! wheres my release!? wheres my release! dont i deserve one?! dont i deserve something!? something to keep me sane something to keep me just ok... ive...ive been lieing to myself non-stop trying to tell myself "hey im ok ^.^, its ok ^.^ im fine ^.^" smile smile smile but the more i smiled the more i died inside...so tell me now whats the point? i cant lie to myself anymore...whyd i lie to myself in the first place? so people'd think i was getting better...and most people see what they wanna see... They close their eyes to the things that scare them or pose a threat.... i dont feel love and i never will you have to love yourself in order to love anyone else and i hate myself so much that i cant even bare to look in the mirror.... im sorry
 Unspoken Fate · Tue Jan 03, 2006 @ 09:02pm · 0 Comments |
