boys are stupid, throw rocks at them!
chapter 1:what are boys and girls?
Girls are bundles of joy and gifts from heaven
boys pick their noses in front of 7-eleven
girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice
boys are made of boogers, cooties, and head lice
girls smell sweet like fresh cut flowers
boys smell like doodieand never take showers!
chapter 2: not all boys are useless!
some boys have unique talents and contribute great things to society.some can actually read!!(picture books, of corse)
some are great chefs! "i make cottage cheese by letting the milk go bad!mmm-mmm-good!"
some are great musicians!"i can fart thestar spangled banner in less that thirty seconds!"
sme are great poets
"roses are red
violets are blue
OH CRAP
i have gum on my shoe!"
some are great singers!
"i can burp the alphabet without even taking a breath!"
some are great improvisers!
"once i ran out of tolite paper and had to use my hand!"
tip:never hold hands with a boy!!!
some make great politicians!
"i vote we have twinkies and snow cones for lunch everyday!"OKK< we lied!
All boys are pretty much useless!
chapter three:
buys are stupid
but it is kinda cute how dumb they are!
FACT:thinking can be dangerous!
IDEAS MAKE BOYS HEAD HURT!
how to make a quick five bucks off aa boy!
girl:do u have siv $5 for a $20?
boy: i only have 5 45s!
girl:can you owe me five later?
boy surprised k!(to himself:sucker!)
its like taking candy from a baby
a few things boys are better at then girls:
1: armpit farting
2:belching words
3:flicking boogers for feild goals
4:spitting in the air and trynig to catch it
5:scarfing down food without breathing
6:eating bugs
7:picking scabs
8:making bubbles in the bathtub (if u know what i mean...)
How come boys dont ask for directions?
gorl:i think were lost
boy:were not lost
girl:maybe we should ask for directions...
boy:we dont need help
girl: but ive seen that house ten times!
boy:thats my house!
girl:isnt that where were going?
boy surprised k were here! told you i dont need help.
hint:if lost, dont ask another boy for directions...hes problally lost too!
why is it that the smellier the boys fart...the prouder he is?
thisngs he might say after the great accomplishment:
"that was my BIG BERTHA!"
"Is someone baking brownies?"
"silent but deadly!"
"you smelt it, you delt it!"
"did smeone sit on a duck?"
philisophy:
is the glass half full-or half empty?
...two hours later:
boy:"im thirsty...can i just drink it niw?
q:if a tree fell on a boy in the woods....
would anyone hear it?
a:WHO CARES????
did you know boys eat yellow snow??
tip:boys...if you mix dirt wiht water you get choclate milk!
why dont boys brush their teeth?
because it wouldnt taste good with the worms they just ate!
other ways boys use tooth paste:
1:glue
2:hair gel
3:put on zits! 4:clean their ears!
5:midafternoon snack
6:squirt each other in the eye.
chapter 4: fun with boys!
do something like this:
girl:im so MAD at you!
boy you barely know:
whats wrong?
girl:well, if you dont know then youll never understand!
(now walk away...)
or talk in secret code
Communicate in completer secrecy in front of boys!
(its called spelling!)
it works like this...
girl 1:t-o-d-d i-s a d-o-r-k.
girl2:t-o-t-a-l-l-y.
only girls understand this secret language!
nature fun!
take a boy on a nature walk.go deep into the woods.
tell him to close his eyes and count to 100.
RUN AWAY!
ill finish later, but niw i gotta go to bed!
fashionkitten123 Community Member 
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