I was talking to Carlos this morning. He was acting totally different. He actually said he missed me ! :'o -gaspshock-
He even admitted I was his friend. Yes he's so closed up he'd never admit that. xD
I was really surprised.
"Where'd you go ? I miss you."
"WHAT? No, the Carlos I know would never say that."
"b***h."
"Now the Carlos I know would say that."
"nojkjkjkjklolololo did that piercing ********' hurt ?"
"omg I love your hair nojkjkjklolol"
"No you don't I look like one of the Beatles."
He said he wants me to stay Freshman year. Thats truly unbelievable. xD
Then he left and said:
"Matthew."
And I was shocked, but I couldn't help but smile.
_____________________________
On another note:
"Rush."
Then I felt the rush, and I quickly withdrew
Everything fell, and all we've been through.
I held back words and the feeling,
As my world crashed right above the ceiling.
I wanted to tell you it wasn't safe, not for me or you.
But you talk like you know what your getting into.
I wanted to scream and tell you old candles spark easy,
that when you speak of him so happily I start to feel queasy.
I've forgotten what it's like to have, to own, to love.
As their only memories to reminiscent of.
So don't get mad if I do.
Because I'm just scared of losing you.
I guess I'm the best kind of fool.
As I play with my heart in a game so cruel,
I don't know why when I'm afraid of loss I see your face.
I don't know why I'm scared of losing you
if I never had you in the first place.
and it hurts. Alot.
_____________________________
Can you feel your heartbeat racing ? Can you feel the fear in her sweat ?
Quote:
"I died today. I drowned my sorrow and shame into my soul,
and then dug myself a grave in my own bed of sweet dreams and nightmares. I know I can see your face tomorrow and for the rest of my life, and then- I
die all over again.
and then dug myself a grave in my own bed of sweet dreams and nightmares. I know I can see your face tomorrow and for the rest of my life, and then- I
die all over again.
