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I am having fun today.I was able to take the guaze off my arm but the brace is probly gonna be on my hand for a few weeks.i sprained it when i fell ans my head still hurts,but im ok anyways.my life is going somewhat ok i guess im happy with my friends(or thats just my heart playing with my mind to keep away the pain again)my family is an entierly different story.im getting sick of giving my sister and dad a hug and telling them i love them which is not true,i hate them more than anyone on the planet.I dont think anyone has told me any bad news that could ruin in my life and make me want to kill myself.(but then again thats probly my heart playing with my head to keep the pain away again as always,my heart tends to block out things it doesnt want to hear)annoyig as my life is(i think)its ok.i just dont want my neice to come down for thanksgiving or christmas cause that would ruin my life yet again.i finally finished blocking out all the memories of her and i dont want to gain new ones.Its annnoying having someone you do(in some essance)care about be repeatedlly away from you.I also clearly need a life,cause i figured out why i like books so much,its keeps me from my thoughts and the real world.life really isnt fair but i WILL be ok and probly remain sane as long as my boyfriend stays with me cause right now he is the only one in my life keeping me sane.I never relized it but hes needed more than i think he was.and im trying to tell my family that,and trying to get them to understand that even though i am young i understand what their going through,but as usual they refuse to listen.i dont know if i just think that cause im fourteen but as they say,'the human voie has power' and as i say,'then i must not be human because no one will listen to me.'its all a stupid ******** lie.god cant wait till monday again,ill get my boyfriend to pull me out of this slum.anyways cant type all day so bye.hopfully your life isnt as sucky as mine is.
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