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SakuMeiMei
Community Member

Posted: Wed Nov 10, 2004 @ 07:29am

5 comments


	I Hate my Life! Ok, you must be wondering who I am...you can look in my profile for that...I'm not going to tell you any more. I want to jump off the balcony. Why? Oh maybe it's because I get mocked every day. Maybe it's because people don't think I'm worthy enough to be a human being. Either way I just want to commit suicide. I realize I cried alot starting that one day in Grade 3. I remember so well that I still cry when I think of it now. People can call me a crybaby. I'm fine with that. I can't help that it hurts so much I start crying. In fact, I don't want to cry. I just do because it helps me feel better. I'm thinking...did I even deserve to come into this world? Am I even worthy of loving anime? Yes? No? I don't know if I will ever find out the answer. I realize that I get hurt alot...physically and emotionally. I remember that in Grade 3 my legs...both of them had bruises on them. There still are some there right now. I also remember that there was a bunch of older kids teasing me and watching me suffer. Did I want that to happen? Was I the one who was making it happen? This isn't some journal entry to attract attention. I just can't put my thoughts into words so that's why I'm typing out this journal entry. Does anyone believe me that I'm not trying to attract attention? I can't just go up and tell my feelings to my friends...especially not now. I just figured out that one of my best friends is betraying me...to who? A dubby! Of all people! A dubby! I think how could I have lost to a dubby? We were best friends for 4 and a half years! Some people say that it wouldn't matter. Well...yes it does. I just lost one of my most loyal friends. Do you think I'd ever find another friend like that? I don't have many friends so I'm trying to keep the ones I have. Is there anything wrong with that? Is it against the law to try to protect what you have? I hope that I have made alot of you think about this and what is happening to you right now so you realize that...you are you. You aren't anybody else. Respect yourself. Don't give in to all those bad things you know that aren't true. I really do hope that I have sent a message to some people who read this. Arigatou

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User Comments: [5]

becoming0304
Community Member

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Commented on: Sat Jan 01, 2005 @ 05:52pm


	Wow. Your entry was very sad. I cry a lot too, but I have trained myself not to in front of people. In this one part of your entry, you said "I'm thinking...did I even deserve to come into this world?" My answer to you is yes, you did deserve it. You need to remember that, "you are you" and you can't change that, so stop caring what people think. I know it's hard, especially with physical ... interaction going on. I'm sorry that you are unhappy, but I know that soon, everything will get better. And remember, you are on this earth for a reason, and God loves you, very much.

Commented on: Wed Apr 13, 2005 @ 03:48pm


	becoming0304 has a point god brought you into this world for a reason so you should not care what others think of you its what you think of your self is what matters most so forget about what the others say they only say it is becouse they want to be just like you i say ingore them biggrin 3nodding dont crying anymore you have us for friends ninja

trouble234340
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ultima50
Community Member

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Commented on: Fri Jul 08, 2005 @ 01:18am


	well i know i shouldn't be commenting in anyone's journal if they aren't my friends but yours was opened to the public so i read it. First of all you have no clue how many people suffer twice as much or worse cuz it really sucks when you can't do nothing about it. it isn't your fault that you are made fun of and it isn't you fault you take pain from them because even if you hide it on the outside its still hurts inside. Secondly i know nothing about losing a loyal friend because i don't have to many regular friends i have friends that i know for a fact that no matter what i would do they wouldn't leave me and i wouldn't do the thing back to them. Secondly to think about doing sucide is dumb because the only thing that happens when you do that is that its over but you must remeber what would make you do that. if you were just to give up you would have shown how they could just easily defeat you like that. People who do sucide are people who give up to easy. I am truely sorry if you don't want me to comment because i am a complete stranger but if you don't want me to comment again please close it off to the public. my sincere appolgies.

Commented on: Mon Jul 11, 2005 @ 06:39am


	Everyone should have the right to love something and yours happens to be anime. Not protecting what you have would be stupid so there's absolutely nothing wrong with that at all. Aren't betraying friends just something in life you have to live through? Plenty of my friends have left me in the past... and none of em came back either.... life is just a pain in the a** sometimes.

HinoKogaSan
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ultima50
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Commented on: Tue Jul 12, 2005 @ 02:20am


	not all your friends are ment to stay with you forever some are you friends for a bit and others may be forever.

User Comments: [5]

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