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Randi's Ramblings My journal...Not much more about it...


Chlorophyllistic
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3 comments
Glad you aren't here

Song: A Whole New World - Aladdin Soundtrack
Mood: Headachey
Emote: domokun

I dreamt of him last night again,
And woke up feeling glad,
I remember he wasn't mine again,
And ended up feeling sad...


So I wake up at about 5 this morning from a series of good warm dreams, which is whats been happening lately. And as usual one of them is about Mat, I don't remember any of it though. My other dreams were so happy and warm though, so I forget about it until I wake up again at 8. One of them had this guy, who has a baby from his last girlfriend, who didn't want the baby. It wasn't a very long dream, cause it switched out right along the time when I was giving his baby his bottle. The next one, I'm in Kansas, and Josh is with me, and it's night time, and we're dancing on the beach, and the moon is full, and the stars are bright, and he's humming a tune to dance too. Then that one switches out for the last one, where it's in the future, I gather, since I'm older, and have a baby on my hip. I'm with my husband -Who has a non-descript face that I cant make out- and our baby, and I'm playing with her, and he's laughing, and we're having a grand old time. When Mat and Jessica walk by! They're happy looking, and they stop and chat for a little while, and Jessica coos over baby Charlie, and I wake up.

Wish you weren't near anymore,
It was so much easier,
When you weren't here anymore,
I didn't have to think of you.









User Comments: [3]
XxThe Boob NazixX
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comment Commented on: Wed Jan 16, 2008 @ 05:11pm
I know the world doesn't revolve around me, thats not what I was saying I was saying that somehow It just makes me cringe that I'm forgotten at least by one person..And it's not like I said Oh I am sooo much better than her stop paying attention to her..I said it's wrong for me to feel that way I know it is. But I talked to Josh every single day and he was like my brother and then now he is like non existent. I have awkward hormones running through me either PMS or something else and It has changed me entirely I can't help that


comment Commented on: Wed Jan 16, 2008 @ 05:27pm
I never mis treated him I duno what he told you but thats not how it was. I actually did love Josh a lot and told him thousands of times that I feel bad because I don't want to use him just for someone to vent on and he went on and on about he wants to because he cares and no matter what he will be there. it's not like I told him I would marry him It's not like I bashed him..I always stuck up for him so I don't know how it's using someone. we both just talked about lots of things. I mean unless he's told you our life story I don't know how you would know any of that.



XxThe Boob NazixX
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XxThe Boob NazixX
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comment Commented on: Wed Jan 16, 2008 @ 05:55pm
Ok the only way I could have mis treated him was not completely loving him as he did me and thats not my fault. Other than that I did nothing


User Comments: [3]
 
 
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