**note** - I didn't make this up. I just want the gold. Its from a book. :3 by scott adams, the dilbert guy.
"It has come to my attention that many of your ancestors were *****. They probably didn't know it, since marrying fifteen year old girls was considered 'normal' by those perverts. And I'm sure they had excuses such as the fact that the life expectancy was seventeen. So maybe they rationalized it by saying that they had to start pinching out new farm hands the fore the plague got to them. Blah blah blah. But that's no excuse for being a *****.
I also have it on good authority that your ancestors from several thousand years ago rarely washed their hands with soup after pooping in the desert, or forest, or igloo, whatever. You come from a long line of unhygienic child molesters.
If you follow your repulsive blood line back far enough, you will find that your ancestors were atheists at best, but more likely worshippers of phalluses.
That's right: you are the genetic fruit of unhygienic, p***s-worshipping, child molesters.
And they could read - those illiterate, unhygienic, p***s-worshipping, child molesters.
Keep going back in time and there's a virtual guarantee that somewhere a cousin married a cousin, or a brother married a sister. Statistically speaking, you're probably an inbred spawn of illiterate, unhygienic, p***s-worshipping, child molesters.
It makes you wonder what dumb-a** things we're doing now that our descendants will find humorously repulsive. I think they'll get a kick out of the fact that about a billion people thought God carved the ten commandments on some stond tablets and somehow the tablets got misplaced. I'd like to know how that conversation went between Moses and Mrs. Moses.
Moses: Honey, have you seen my stone tablets from God?
Mrs. Moses: They didn't match the carpets so i threw them out
Moses: WHAT?? those came directly from GOD!
Mrs. Moses: sure they did you daffy b******."
-an excerpt from Stick to Drawing Comics, Monkey Brain! by Scott Adams
 bloop913 · Fri Dec 28, 2007 @ 09:23pm · 4 Comments |
