If you looked into my eyes
Would you see someone worthy?
Would you see someone who’s hurting?
Or would you see
The darker side of me
And nothing else.
Would you feel the pain that I have felt?
Or feel only the pain that I have caused others.
Would you care that I want so badly
To cry?
Could your heart be moved for a monster?
What have I become?
Someone born without sin, is who I was.
Someone who had never shed the blood of family.
And now, with blood on my hands, and anger inside,
I look out at a world that has hated me
And I wonder…
How could I have done it any differently?
Do you think I love myself,
Because I boast?
Do you think I feel powerful,
Because I flaunt my control?
Or could you feel, if you tried,
Every breath that is fading,
Every tear suppressed
And turned to something…
That doesn’t frighten me so much.
How I wish
Like all my loved ones,
That I could have been a good person.
How I wish that I could accept
This fate that has been given to me.
I see an angel
Come to us,
And can only hate her—
For she has taken my security,
My beliefs,
My one constant thing—my one stability—anger.
And made me wish… for something softer.
I see the pain of the ones I love.
I hear the words of hate, coming from my mouth.
And I long to awaken, as someone clean.
Do you know what it feels like to be the bad guy?
It feels bad.
And nothing else.
Nenra Community Member 
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