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The animals scream apon the trees
yor walking confused on sticks and stones
just woke up from passing out
wondering where you are
your hearing things
screach and call as you begin to fall
the wind blows faster as the trees begin to move
more screams are made as you get scared and start to run
you run faster and faster but you feel u go no where
you start to cry but as that tear falls off your cheek it rains
after awhile comes thunder and lighting
you scream but nobody hears you
you fall and lean on a tree
down from behind you comes a poisness snake
you try to moveand get bit
your eyes close slowly and take your last breath
you ask yourself one last time where am i the last tear starts to fade you die who knows how long. emo
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- by xxxxBLOODED_EMOxxxx |
- Poetry And Lyrics
- | Submitted on 02/16/2010 |
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- Title: The Krying Forest
- Artist: xxxxBLOODED_EMOxxxx
- Description:
- Date: 02/16/2010
- Tags: krying forest
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Comments (3 Comments)
- xperfect circlex - 02/21/2010
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It's just good.
maybe a 2/5 :/
it needs a lot of revising...
I suggest being less dramatic.
it was great at first but then crying and screaming in the rain is just way too cliche.
But otherwise, I'd love to see this revised... it'd be great =) - Report As Spam
- Zurah - 02/20/2010
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Crying is with a 'c', not a 'k'.
If you ignore the vast array of mechanical problems, the poem is still crap. I suggest a large dose of techno-pop (Freezepop is yummy!), and a good friend. Maybe some ice cream, too. - Report As Spam
- The Rogue Butler - 02/16/2010
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Pretty good although you spelt screech and poisonous wrong smile
but apart frm tht its real good, 5/5 - Report As Spam