• I slowly stitch my soul back together
    With thread of black
    That is created by the others of my life
    and graciously given to me as to prevent my life from leaving me

    The red will often seep through the stitches with every thought
    Every glance of the words your “heart” writes
    But together, myself and the others can clean up the drops that escape
    With distractions and brighter ways
    And so for the time my soul is mended

    But only temporarily

    For then when I fall back into the past
    Drowning in the unspoken words that haunt my mind
    And dance across my eyelids
    And whisper in my thoughts
    The black thread loosens its hold
    Its strength
    And falls to the ground
    Dragging me along with it

    So we are both lying on the ground
    And I am leaking clear
    As my heart leaks red
    My heart has split yet again
    Releasing my soul
    Which flies to you

    Yet now
    It cries bright red for you
    Pours down over your head
    Covering your eyes and ears
    Preventing words from escaping your lips
    Paralyzing you with pain
    Haunting you with its screams
    For you were the one…
    You are the one…
    The one that shattered my vulnerable soul,
    Open to you,
    For you.
    Trusting for you
    And with my defenses down
    You struck

    My mind has yet to fathom why…
    Why is my soul repetitively pulled back to you,
    Despite the devastating blow you dealt it?
    I search for the reason

    But to no avail

    Which is quite unfortunate
    For my mind has to tell my heart and soul
    The answer they require
    To cease the constant
    Breaking
    Crying
    Mending
    Shattering
    Bleeding
    Healing
    Each cycle of my soul shows no change
    No improvement
    So I fear there is no end
    And if this is true,
    Will I have to always watch you through a mirrored window
    Watching your life
    While all you can see is your own life reflected
    Mine is no longer visible to you

    Will I be condemned to that pain?
    Will my soul ever be free from you?
    Or will someone be able to heal the wounds you left me with?
    Someone who takes my fragile heart
    And handles it with care
    Not blindly dropping it to the ground
    Where it can be wounded and shattered
    As you had done so easily