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I talk but no one hears,
i speak and no one listens,
I fall but no one helps,
I cry but no one cares,
Will someone hear me when I speak,
Willl someone ever listen,
Will someone help me when I fail,
Will someone even care?
- by UsakoBunnyTsukino24601 |
- Poetry And Lyrics
- | Submitted on 12/14/2008 |
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- Title: Invisable
- Artist: UsakoBunnyTsukino24601
- Description: About a person felling lost and unseen. this peoson is asking questions on wha=y people are egnoring her/him.
- Date: 12/14/2008
- Tags: invisable
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Comments (6 Comments)
- Dat_Hatez666 - 12/18/2008
- that was lovely i love
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- Hatchet Girl 1990 - 12/17/2008
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It's not that good.
The first four lines are practically repeated in the next four lines.
It needs to be more creative and grab peoples emotions to actually feel the sorrow.
And no emotes from now on lol - Report As Spam
- UsakoBunnyTsukino24601 - 12/16/2008
- ok i will do that and thank you for telling me that im trying to be a famous poet and that will probubly help me.
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- CazzyxBear - 12/14/2008
- the little emotes at the end = Fail. Its a bit.... no wait. its really overdone. it needs alot of work. make it stand out and be interesting. 2/5
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