-
Life is for the living
Death is for the dead
Let life be like music
Let death be a note unsaid
Life is like an ocean
It has storms
It has gentel tides
Let your ocean be gentle
You may say this life sucks
You may thinks it's unfair
You may want to kill yourself
But let me tell you, the dead wish they were living
- by snow cat1243 |
- Poetry And Lyrics
- | Submitted on 09/27/2008 |
- Skip
- Title: Life And Dead
- Artist: snow cat1243
- Description: A little poem I thought of
- Date: 09/27/2008
- Tags: life
- Report Post
Comments (3 Comments)
- Ms Make Me Smile - 10/04/2008
- i think it has huge potential and the ryming was good but the last line i dont think worked with the rest of the poem 3/5,your poems do have a lot of potential reallly they do
- Report As Spam
- jinnicky - 09/27/2008
- Maybe revisit the subject and use a bit more tact. It's all a bit wishy washy and that last stanza sounds completely wrong with the rest of the poem. And death be a note unsaid? Look, if you have to force a rhyme, then just use a different style for the poem. Just because it's poetry does not mean it has to rhyme.
- Report As Spam
- Naruko_Kazama - 09/27/2008
- it's so deep
- Report As Spam
- |
- |
-
Submit
