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Okay, so its obvious. I'm different from the other kids. I am a shapeshifter, and its 'weird', I guess to be different. Once I had shown my parents my other forms, I realized I was adopted because they didn't know what I was, and it made me terribly sad to see their reaction. So then, I tried my friend's houses, but no help there, so I ran.
The freezing cold stung at my fingertips as I balled my hands into fists, my teeth chattering non-stop. If it weren’t for my sweater, I swear I’d be frozen by now. I needed a heavier jacket if I was going to live in these woods—well, no duh. I couldn’t go back home, not after what happened with my parents. My friends were no help to me; all of them wouldn’t let me stay with them, not a single one. My chest hurt when I inhaled and exhaled; my eyes welling up with tears. Things were wrong, all wrong, I couldn't stand it. It was then, that I saw a shadow, and my heart began to pound inside of my chest.
The boy was beautiful, with bright green eyes and dark, chocolate brown hair. He was staring at me as if I were a bright, glimmering diamond among a pile of sea shells. "You and your pretty little face don't belong here," he murmured, pushing a strand of my hair off to the side. "You should go home." I gulped, my throat dry, which made it hard to speak. "I can't go home..." I replied to him, my voice a low, cracking whisper. He just stared at me, his face concerned. "Oh, and why is that?" I couldn't talk about it, it was too much, so much that it brought tears to my eyes, flowing out and onto my cheeks, dripping into the snow. His warm hand touched my face, sending a shiver through my spine. "Now, now. Is it really, really truely that bad?" I nodded. Nothing was worse then what had happened to me. This boy- he seemed so familliar, but I couldn't put a name to the face, which, disturbed me greatly. He was handling me with such care, with such a tender voice. I felt drawn to him- tied by a string that wasn't able to be untied. I collapsed in his arms, my mind lost, with my thoughts all swirling inside my head. He just smiled, and held me tightly, which surprised me even more.

- Title: Cold to the Touch, Chapter 1
- Artist: xToxxie
- Description: A story about a girl who's world goes totally ascrew. Okay, and guys, I will NOT space this out, because I want to be a regular author and write real books so I'm practicing the style.
- Date: 09/28/2008
- Tags: cold touch
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Comments (7 Comments)
- lost in my frozen dreams - 03/28/2010
- lovin it so far
- Report As Spam
- princejjt08 - 05/01/2009
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like the title its the kind of title like
Twilight - Report As Spam
- mamupolz - 09/30/2008
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cool! hope to read more from you ^_^
nice story cant wait! :3 - Report As Spam
- ch1ps0h0y - 09/28/2008
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Mmph...you need to start a new line every time someone different speaks.
Punctuation wise, there's a few places where a comma isn't necessary. In the first paragraph, you used a semi-colon where it should really have been a comma. Semi-colons are used when you want to connect two VERY closely related sentences but both are true SENTENCES by themselves.
Hmm...it could have been better overall. 3/5 stars. - Report As Spam
- Tavril - 09/28/2008
- strange story i will keep checking to see how it goes
- Report As Spam
- Salem Jones - 09/28/2008
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It was alright, I'd give it three out of five because while it seems to be written well with no punctuation problems, I could've gone for more spacing because most of it looks like just hugh blocks of text.
I also felt like not enough was explained to me, and it all seemed pretty vague... why has she ran away from home and why was it so horrible? I hope you'll perhaps go back in the next chapter in order to explain more throughly.
Goodluck with your future chapters smile - Report As Spam